Sunday, May 12, 2013


At this beginning of this year, I felt the Spirit whispering to me that things were about to change.
It did not specify WHAT.
But the feeling persisted and persists. A whisper, "Things are going to change. So cherish what is."

And I've wondered and watched.
Will it be a new calling?
Will it be a new baby?
Will it be a new house?
A new job?

On Thursday I got a call from my kid's school. About 15 minutes after school got out and only minutes before the bus was supposed to drop them off. I looked at the caller ID and thought "Huh?"

A frantic secretary. Something is wrong with your son. We don't know what . He isn't responding. You'd better come.

So I yanked the wee munchkin out of a blissful, deep sleep, dragged Thing 3 away from her promised half hour of TV, and drove as fast as I could to the school.  My daughter's teacher was waiting at the front door to grab my other kids. My son was in the nurse's office. Eyes open, but no one was home. A vacant stare.

The teachers and principals start telling me what they saw--it sounds like a seizure. Boy starts coming around. He cocks an eyebrow at me. He doesn't remember what happened or how he got where he is. At the pediatrician they go from unconcerned to more concerned. It isn't a fever or dehydration or low blood sugar or an inner ear infection.

We have an EEG tomorrow. They want to look at some scary things. Little pieces of a puzzle, coming into place. And I wonder to myself "Is this it? Is this what you're trying to tell me?"

I still don't know.
Sometimes, that is ok.
And sometimes, I am afraid to find out.